This weekend I was spiritually attacked. In conversation, someone asked me what I would do if when in Haiti, everything went wrong...I get sick and I'm not safe. And when I come back I don't get a job and I can't find a car, ect. At the time I was shocked and didn't know what to say and started talking nonsense. I had always considered that I will get sick and things aren't going to all be fine and dandy when I am in Haiti and when I come back home so when I was forced to really think about it, it bothered me and Satan took hold of it.
I kept thinking that it's not that hard...I trust that God will take care of me. He has prepared the way for me on this trip and if it is in His will, he will take care of me. It's to the point that I don't even want to think about what may happen because it doesn't really matter. Matt 6:34, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." I need to live in the present and not worry about the future. I trust God to take care of me.
For a few seconds, I doubted that I trusted too much because I hasn't really given any of those thoughts a lot of time. That was quickly snuffed out by my confidence in trusting the Lord. I believe that if it is God's will for me to go to Haiti, he will protect me, take care of me, and provide for me when I am there and when I return. This was solidified this week when I read Luke 11: 9-10, "So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."
I pray that God will show me what I seek in this adventure, keep me safe, free from sickness, provide for me when I am in need, and open doors when I return home.
I know that Mark 12:30 says, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength." I want to change that a little bit...all week something else keeps popping up in my head. In my mind I keep saying, Trust in the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.