On Thursday, I got a facebook message from Bree Bauman (some of you may know her from college ministries before she left). She works for a non-profit who will be providing two teachers to an American family who lives in Haiti to home-school their 4 school age children. Yes, Haiti for the next school year...9 months. I would get paid through the non-profit and get to come home every 3 months to renew my work visa.
I love Haiti. I went last May with my school and knew I wanted to come back again. And if you ask my family or very close friends, I have always said I wanted to teach in another county for a year. I just didn't know how I was going to do it or when. In my current search for a job, I put it on the back burner thinking well if I don't get a job next year then I will consider it. I don't need to worry about it right now because I'm going to get a job.
And then God throws it at me. I end up not even having to search for it.
So now I am considering leaving everything behind and moving to Haiti for the school year to teach, feed, and love the people of Haiti. I don't know what God's plan is for me and I want so desperately to be obedient to Him.
A lot of worldly problems and fears arise every time I think about it. My parents won't even talk with me about it right now.
Psalm 25 from the RH blog really stuck out to me this week. 1 In you, Lord my God,
I put my trust.
This came from the Reeve's family blog that I have been reading ever since I found out about them. This is the family I would be home-schooling. This was just in a random blog sometime at the beginning of moving to Haiti that I stumbled across and really spoke to me. It actually made me cry.
You don't have to worry. Full surrender to God means he will make it possible to do exactly what it is you want to do! As you surrender, God changes your heart to where what He made you for is exactly what you want! It does not mean He is going to drag you into the jungle where you dread going. He is going to allow you to experience the life you were made for. The life He created you for from the beginning of time. Don't let it slip away. Don't let fear and misconceptions of God rob you of what you could experience and also steal away the opportunity for you to bring God ultimate glory with your life. The fully surrendered life is best you can have now, and for all of eternity.
But with everything to think about, what does God want me to do? What is His will? How can I further His kingdom right now, here or Haiti?
Slices, I need your prayer. This is a HUGE decision for me and I want to earnestly seek God for his direction, clarity, and wisdom.
You are in my prayers. This is a good prayer for everyone really... I'm sure that as much as we want to surrender ourselves to God or like to think that we do, its this fear and misconception that keeps us from truly give our whole heart up to God.
ReplyDeleteLindsey! I absolutely loved spending time with you tonight and I am most definitely praying for you! What a huge decision. I know that you have such an obedient and caring heart, God will you use you in amazing ways in the near future! I am sure of it. Whether it be in Haiti or substituting screaming unruly high schoolers, God will have his hand on you.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to quote you back to you really fast here, "as you surrender, God changes your heart to where what He made you for is exactly what you want.". And "He is going to allow you to experience the life you were made for." I loved that. Amen. Thank you for writing truth. You have my prayers and support!
wow what an opportunity! praying for you!
ReplyDeleteLindsey I am so excited for you to have this opportunity! I will be praying for clarity, direction, wisdom, and peace. I will be praying for you family's heart in this matter also. God has given you a heart for Haiti and will use that. It may not be now, but it might be :) Looking forward to our lunch/dinner date ;)
ReplyDeleteLindsey, thank you for sharing what's been going on. You reminded me of a friend that decided to go on a mission trip for three years. I will pray for you. And whatever happens, I know that God will be glorified in you.
ReplyDeleteSO EXCITED
ReplyDelete&&&& praying for you :) xoxo
May we all surrender!
made me cry too! ahhh. wow. so good. I have never heard it like that. and it is so true.
ReplyDeleteI am really excited for you. I will pray for your family. They sound a little like mine. : ) Please take comfort in knowing how THAT feels.
I am praying for you, precious girl. Do whatever it takes for you to seek Him and be still: fast, silence, solitude, prayer.
Your heart is in such a beautiful spot. Seek surrender, whatever that may mean. Sometimes the answer isn't as clear as it seems. : )
For sure I am praying. Ah! Such a huge decision! Exciting yet unnerving. Definitely something you really need to pray about and I am sure our prayers will help! I really liked that last paragraph you shared about how God changes your heart. Such a perfect thing for me to hear. AIso, I am stoked that you want to help people in another country because I think that is a really cool thing that people go do, and I believe that even just traveling changes your life entirely. This new opportunity that you have is definitely something that I want to be updated about, so whether it is a blog post, facebook post, or general conversation, just so that there are more ways to be praying for you! :)
ReplyDeleteSo excited for you Linds! Talking with you about this I can clearly see the heart God has given you for Haiti. Im so proud of you!
ReplyDelete